Simian City News! A Rare Species Spotted

'About time we heard
something from this Writer Monkey'

And now it's time for the latest news from your favourite...

SIMIAN CITY NEWS!

I'm your host, Fun. E. Chimp.

   Today there has been an incredibly rare sighting of the Writer Monkey said to have lived in the cave just south of our jungle broadcasting station. Eyewitnesses have confirmed from this that the Writer Monkey is in fact not dead and has neither been abducted by chocolate. Our on site news reporter Monkey Gone Wild is with professor What's His Name as we speak who has offered to comment on this event. Over to you Monkey.

   ~Well thank you Fun. Yes right now I'm here at the professor's study enjoying a cooling banana smoothie and speaking with him about what exactly can make a Writer Monkey disappear besides easily suspected chocolate abductions. Professor, what exactly is your opinion?

   >Well Monkey, as I see it the thing which young writer monkeys are easily prone to suffer from but which isn't as easily obvious to the casual observer are laziness attacks, the I-Can't-Think-Of-What-To-Say Syndrome and a very infectious disease known in layman's terms as "But The Game Is Just So Fun." Once contracted this horrible infection almost forces the potential writer to re-focus all of his or her attention onto a video game or other similar activity, denying them the time to focus on their writing. It's really quite tragic.

   ~And you believe the Writer Monkey might have contracted this illness?

   >I really can't say, but so far I've only found one cure for the condition, and let's just say it involves a pair of pliers, barbed wire, a sack of feathers, a rocking horse and super glue.

   ~I can't honestly say I want to hear you put all that together, professor.

   >That's strange. A lot of people say that...

   ~Anyway, now back to the studio.

   In related news there is evidence that Electrostatic Fantasy is in fact nearing completion. These statements, although deemed incredulous by some, bear out in the sense that nearly half of the novel now stands in a final form of editing.

   Our efforts to contact the Monkey have also *cough*finally*cough cough* succeeded and there is news of upcoming regular updates and an updating schedule.

   Please stay tuned for the next broadcast of SIMIAN CITY NEWS!!